- Don’ts
Have negative expectations.
Focus on mistakes.
Expect perfection.
Overly protect children.
Dos
Show confidence in children’s abilities.
Build on children’s strengths.
Value children as they are.
Stimulate independence. - Communication That Builds Self-esteem
Active listening
Use of positive language
Discarding “labels”
Use of encouragement
Use of the “I” method of communication - The “I” method has 4 recommended steps.
1. Statement of behavior or situation to be addressed (eg, “When
you…”)
2. Statement in specific terms of how one feels about the effect of
the situation on oneself (eg, “I feel…”)
3. Statement of reason (eg, “because…”)
4. Statement of expectations (eg, “I would like…” or “I want…”)
Using this approach, a parent’s statement might be: “When you
speak so unkindly, I feel upset because I would never speak with you
in that way. It makes you seem like the kind of person that you are
not. I would like you to speak with me in the way we all try to speak
with you, no matter how angry you feel.”
Dr. Jayaprakash
Superintendent, ICH.
Institute of Child Health.
Gov. Medical College Kottayam.
Kerala, India.